


You, Me, Selfishly

by littlev123



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, Gen, King Leon | Leo, Sick Character, War, mentions of assisted suicide, not written as romantic but feel free to see it that way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 13:54:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19230460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlev123/pseuds/littlev123
Summary: "A harsh breeze blew outside and caused the old window sill to creak. After it stopped, the king’s labored breathing was the only noise to keep silence at bay. Beyond the bedroom door nothing could be heard—no siblings walking the halls, nor servants fulfilling duties.Calloused fingers picked up Leo's thin hand. Niles dropped to one knee.'I won’t leave you on your own.' He gently pressed the other's knuckles to his own chest, over his heart. 'You have my word.'"Nohr is in shambles, and Niles is the only one standing between the Hoshidans and the ill King Leo.





	You, Me, Selfishly

**Author's Note:**

> So uhhhh this is just self-indulgent AU angst I wrote during breaks at work. Because of that it's pretty messy, but I figured hey, might as well post it in case anyone else is in the mood for feels with King Leo and Niles.

“…Niles.”

Niles straightened from where he’d been hunched over King Leo’s desk. All documents, some half-finished or marred with ink blots, lay on one side. Wood oil, Niles’ bow, and a worn quiver covered the rest. 

Rising from his seat, he turned to the fever-glazed eyes watching him. A sheen of drying sweat coated Leo’s too pale skin, and his cheekbones stood out in sharp relief without any fat left to round his face. But his focus didn’t waver as Niles walked to his bedside; the other’s mind was having a rare break in the fog of illness. 

“Drink some water, milord.” He helped the younger man slowly sit up before grabbing the untouched glass on the nightstand. 

Leo’s mouth tilted downward in a grimace—he must be feeling nauseous again—but he allowed him to put the cup to his lips. After two minuscule sips he shakily waved it away. 

“How close are the Hoshidans?”

“They’re traveling quickly. I hear they will reach the castle by tomorrow.”

Leo pinched the bridge of his nose, as if the action could alleviate what was surely a pounding headache. “…I see.”

“All of our available troops will defend the castle. I have a small force inside as well.” The remnants of the Nohrian army still loyal to the king were under-equipped and malnourished, but he didn’t have to mention that. The blond already knew the horrendous odds better than anyone. Niles had tried to rally anyone he could while the other was bedridden. He’d even scoured the underground for criminals he could bend to his will. 

“I want to move you to one of the hidden rooms before I set the traps,” Niles added.

Leo nodded, yet his fingers weakly twisted in the blankets. The retainer couldn’t blame him. Leo was a king with a dying kingdom, a sick patient worsening by the day, and a boy who missed his family. His desperate grasp on his suffocated pride had to slip even further to agree to hiding.

“You must swear to me,” Leo suddenly said.

“Swear what?”

He attempted to take a deep breath, which ended in a wet cough instead. “…you will not let them capture me.”

“Of course—”

“I would rather die by your hand than face their wrath alone.” His gaze shifted away, and his strained voice further quieted. “Regardless of how much I deserve it.”

Eye wide, Niles opened his mouth to protest. His liege’s death could not be decided so easily. Leo was young and smart and _powerful_ , still was, he just needed time to recover—

“I _refuse_ to be the last one. Please. Let me keep being selfish.” Leo slumped against the pillows, and he’d grown paler with the effort of speaking so long. 

A harsh breeze blew outside and caused the old window sill to creak. After it stopped, the king’s labored breathing was the only noise to keep silence at bay. Beyond the bedroom door nothing could be heard—no siblings walking the halls, nor servants fulfilling duties. 

Calloused fingers picked up a thin hand. Niles dropped to one knee.

“I won’t leave you on your own.” He gently pressed Leo’s knuckles to his own chest, over his heart. “You have my word.”

\---

There was a tickle in the back of Niles’ throat. 

He swallowed hard against it and set the last trap. 

He then glanced back at Leo, who slept through his latest fever spike. A damp rag lay on his forehead, and his breaths sounded shallow and fitful. However, the fact that he was breathing at all was enough to fuel Niles’ determination. 

As the archer stretched his limbs, he ignored the heaviness draped over his body like a blanket. He should have guessed all the stress, lack of sleep and food, and being around Leo nearly 24/7 would slam his immune system. With the Hoshidans arriving any minute, at least he wouldn’t have to worry about the illness hitting him full force yet. 

Muffled through the thick stone walls, the sounds of blades clashing and shouts of challenge arose.

Leo didn’t stir. Hopefully he would stay unconscious through whatever happened next. Niles pulled the curtain around the bed closed.

All too soon, the floor shook as what must be an army burst through the massive grand entrance doors. Niles readied his bow. 

Crashes in the bedrooms. Brief quiet, like they were confused to find their target wasn’t there. Then spread out footsteps and rattles of armor as they started to search. 

Then, what he’d been waiting for: cords snapping as traps launched arrows, knives, and mini bombs. 

Niles knocked an arrow. 

He released it the moment the door swung open. It embedded into someone’s shoulder, and in one smooth motion he loosed another one. 

The glint of shruiken made him pause long enough to doge the projectile flying at him. That was all it took for a female ninja to be upon him and force him on the defense. He blocked one, two, three blows—

“Kagero!”

She jumped away, and he was greeted by a fireball. With Hoshidans crowding the front of the room and his unwillingness to draw attacks too close to Leo, he couldn’t effectively avoid it. Flames struck his left arm, burned through clothing, and seared skin. The damage extended from shoulder to elbow, and he knew trying to fire arrows with this injury would take too long. Grunting at the pain, he dropped his bow and pulled a dagger from his belt. 

“ _Halt_ ,” a commanding, deep voice called out.

Niles paused, if only for the sake of putting off his and Leo’s inevitable fate. A large man in red armor stepped forward.

“I am Ryoma, King of Hoshido,” he introduced. “There is no need to keep fighting. You’ve already lost. Surrender and we will be merciful to you both.”

Between panting breaths, Niles gave a wild grin. “Yeah, I know the outcome. But I can still take you down with us.” Suddenly he had taken exactly three steps back to loop his finger around a previously hidden string behind Leo’s desk. It was connected to a volley of makeshift bombs, far more than he’d put in the halls, and it would easily destroy anything in the room.

Ryoma stiffened, and the soldiers around him snapped into fighting stances. Several showed wariness and sported gashes or burns from previous traps.

The sound of a curtain’s swish had Niles throwing his dagger without a single thought. It lodged into the wall and left a deep slice in Kagero’s shoulder. She released the curtain to press a hand to the injury, what was done had been done. Leo had been revealed. 

A gust of surprise flew through the thick, tense atmosphere in the room. All eyes witnessed the King of Nohr’s gaunt face and raspy breathing. 

A soft gasp came from a redheaded healer—the youngest princess, Sakura, if Niles remembered right. Hands covering her mouth, she had leaned around Ryoma to see better, and palpable pity shone on her face.

“When did he become this ill…?” Ryoma muttered. 

Niles clicked his tongue. The noise startled the enemies out of their surprise, and attention returned to him.

It was inevitable they’d discover Leo’s condition. However, it still felt like Niles had lost any pretense of advantage he’d clung to. 

“Ask an artist to take a picture. It’ll last longer.” His icy tone belied his words. Blood pounded in his ears. “But I’d much rather you keep those intense looks on me.”

Composure returned, Ryoma spoke once more. “Your king is in no condition for this to be dragged out. The sooner you surrender, the sooner we can take him to our doctors.”

An empty chuckle erupted from the retainer’s throat. It started low, grew into a disbelieving cackle, and then dissolved into damning coughs. 

“…you think I’ll believe it’s that easy? That if I give up, you won’t kill me and show off my liege like a trophy?”

“There has been enough bloodshed,” the Hoshidan king insisted. If Niles didn’t know any better, he would have thought the wrinkles on the other’s face deepened with a war-weariness. “We won’t kill you if you come peacefully—”

“Torture, then.” His single eye met the other’s gaze. “I must warn you, I am a tough one to break.”

Several of his opponents looked startled by the accusation, and Ryoma quickly shook his head. “No. We do not torture our prisoners. Your safety, as well as King Leo’s, is assured.”

Niles scoffed. 

The little princess, shoulders hunched but determination steadying her legs, took a small step forward. “P-Please. He’s not going to last much longer. Wh-What use would making us k-kill you be?”

“I won’t let it be by your hands,” he murmured.

Her mouth gaped, and, damn, he hadn’t meant to let that slip. Too late now.

Ryoma made to speak again, but Sakura abruptly continued. “I understand! W-Well, not exactly, but I know you care so much about him. Like how Hana and Tsubaki would do anything for me, y-you’re trying to fulfill the king’s wishes as much as possible.” She straightened and, despite the tears threatening to spill down her cheeks, her chin was raised high. “I beg you. Neither of you will be harmed, and we will do everything we can to save him. You may stay by his side no matter where he goes and have the right to choose who interacts with him until he is well. I give you my word as princess of Hoshido.”

The people around her appeared stunned. Niles hardly noticed; his mind was too busy twisting around the idea. 

She seemed honest, but that meant nothing. Or Ryoma could override her decision. It was highly likely that such a deal would last only until Niles had no more strength to resist. Naturally it was also possible that this was all a ruse to lower his guard.

…but there was that tiny, tiny chance surrendering could save Leo’s life.

If Leo were awake, he knew the blond would refuse. The potential humiliation of being a war prisoner and prize may be more than the younger’s battered psyche could bear. There was also his request, which rang incessantly in his ears. It could be impossible to avoid separation since they’d be at the mercy of the enemy’s whims.

That left Niles with a dilemma: should his loyalty go toward Leo’s survival, or Leo’s will?

His fingers released the string.

_I’m sorry, milord. I’m a selfish man too._

She sighed in relief, and Ryoma nodded in acknowledgement of his decision. 

“We appreciate your choice.” The corner of Ryoma’s mouth tugged upward in a tired almost-smile. “We can finally end this war.”

“I stopped caring about the war a long time ago.” Half-turning away, Niles walked to the bedside. His muscles stayed bunched, waiting for a sword between his shoulder blades that never came. 

“I have to move you,” he apologetically murmured. He slid one hand under his knees and the other under his back. Pain flared along the charred part of his arm, and it took every ounce of willpower not to flinch back.

A footsteps. “One of us can—”

Niles didn’t turn around. “Touch him and you will know the wrath of a hundred hells.”

That warning, oozing dark promise, was enough to stop whoever it was. He didn’t care to know who.

He lifted Leo up. His arm screamed as the weight pulled at raw skin, but he kept his hold steady. Nothing less than amputation would make him put Leo down right now.  
Other than a particularly harsh shuddering breath, the Nohrian king didn’t stir. 

The retainer turned and started toward the waiting soldiers. Each footstep felt heavy, and he suspected it wasn’t just from physical exertion. When he neared the doorway, several Hoshidans moved to surround him. The damp rag upon Leo’s forehead slipped and landed on the floor. Not that it mattered; it had long since lost its coolness. However, he noticed Sakura start to reach for it, and something not completely unpleasant twisted in his chest.

“He needs a new one anyway,” he said, and she straightened with a jerky nod.

They broke away to allow him through the narrow doorway, and once through they circled him again. His instincts despised being trapped regardless of the foot-wide berth they left him. Ryoma was talking, as well as a couple others. He ignored the conversation in favor of swallowing down oncoming coughs.

Everything moved quickly after that. Soon they were outside, Ryoma announced Hoshido’s victory, and jubilant shouts roared. The few remaining Nohrians either fled or found themselves captured. Niles peered through the slivers where the people of his entourage weren’t quite shoulder-to-shoulder. They were preventing others from receiving a full view of himself and Leo, for now. It must be obvious to everyone who was being hidden, though.

Niles raised his gaze to gray clouds. The familiar sight offered him an anchor amid the overwhelming bustle around him. Cold winds snuck through his entourage to chill his face and hands. 

“Maybe a little sunlight will do us both good, eh, milord?” he whispered to the too-warm boy in his arms.


End file.
